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British monarchy rocked by bad Photoshop job

A screenshot of a recent Instragam post on the Prince and Princess of Wales’s profile. It is Kate Middleton surrounded by her children and it appears to be edited.
Screenshot by Alex Cranz/The Verge

After months of speculation on the whereabouts of Kate Middleton, the Princess of Wales and future Queen of England, the Royal Family released an image today that appears to have been edited. It’s so edited that the Associated Press and Reuters issued rare kill notifications for it.

It is incredible in its ineptitude. If the goal was to reassure the public about Middleton’s whereabouts, the image has backfired spectacularly.

The image is unsettling at first glance. Everyone is smiling so brightly they look like a Snapchat filter. Middleton is seated in the image — understandable given she had some sort of undisclosed abdominal procedure in January — but the perspective seems wrong. Are her arms really that long? The more you stare at the image the more you feel like you’re reading Highlights in the waiting room of your dentist. Can you find every problem in the picture?

It is still up on the Prince and Princess of Wales’ Instagram page so you can go over examine it for yourself, but here are a few screenshots to highlight areas that look like they were edited by someone new to Photoshop and leaning heavy on the Heal tool.

This image was released months after Middleton disappeared from public view. The Royal Family has been cagey about her health and what has led to her absence, leading to conspiracy theories. Dropping a clearly edited image of her on Mother’s Day in the UK isn’t going to help matters.

And for the British monarchy, image is everything, as revealed in Spare, the memoir by Prince Harry. In it, Middleton’s brother-in-law writes about how he was sacrificed to the British tabloids to distract from stories that might have made his father (King Charles) or his brother (Prince William, heir apparent) look bad. The art of image management is key for the royal family, and has been since Queen Elizabeth’s coronation was broadcast live. An important part of the royals’ jobs is appearing in photos.

The palace is chummy enough with the British press that there’s a system — the Royal Rota — for covering them. The Duke and Duchess of Sussex, Harry and Meghan, bowed out of the Royal Rota, as part of their general retreat from royal duties. Managing the press was also the forte of Middleton’s mother in law, Diana Spencer, who managed to secure a divorce through a bombshell interview with Martin Bashir.

The Middleton photo raises some questions. It’s possible this is just a case of shitty Photoshop used to stitch together several photos so that the best expression on each person’s face was used. (Children are notorious for being difficult to photograph.) But the job is so clumsy, particularly around the hands, that one wonders if the intent was to keep us all talking about Middleton’s prolonged absence.